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Successful Rural Plays 

A Strong List From Which to Select Your 
Next Play 

FARM FOLKS. A Rural Play in Four Acts, by Arthur 
LEWIS Tubes. For five male and six female characters. Time 
o;f playing, two hours and a half. One simple exterior, two 
easy interior scenes. Costumes, modern. Flora Goodwin, a 
farmer's daughter, is engaged to Philip Burleigh, a young New 
Yorker. Philip's mother wants him to marry a society woman, 
and by falsehoods makes Flora believe Philip does not love her. 
Dave Weston, who wants Flora himself, helps the deception by 
intercepting a letter from Philip to Flora. She agrees to marry 
Dave, but on the eve of their marriage Dave confesses, Philip 
learns the truth, and he and Flora are reunited. It is a simple 
plot, but full of speeches and situations that sway an audience 
alternately to tears and to laughter. Price, 25 cents. 

HOME TIES. A Rural Play in Four Acts, by Arthur 
Lewis Tubes. Characters, four male, five female. Plays two 
hours and a half. Scene, a simple interior — same for all four 
acts. Costumes, modern. One of the strongest plays Mr. Tubbs 
has written. Martin Winn's wife left him when his daughter 
Ruth was a baby. Harold Vincent, the nephew and adopted son 
of the man who has wronged Martin, makes love to Ruth Winn. 
She is also loved by Len Everett, a prosperous young farmer. 
When Martin discovers who Harold is, he orders him to leave 
Ruth. Harold, who does not love sincerely, yields. Ruth dis- 
covers she loves Len, but thinks she has lost him also. Then • 
he comes back, and Ruth finds her happiness. Price 25 cents. 

THE OLD NEW^ HAMPSHIRE HOME. A New 

England Drama in Three Acts, by Frank Dumont. For seven 
males and four females. Time, two hours and a half. Costumes, 
modern. A play with a strong heart interest and pathos, yet rich 
in humor. Easy to act and very effective. A rural drama of 
the "Old Homstead" and "Way Down East" type. Two ex- 
terior scenes, one interior, all easy to set. Full of strong sit- 
uations and delightfully humorous passages. The kind of a play 
everybody understands and likes. Price, 25 cents. 

THE OLD DAIRY HOMESTEAD. A Rural Comedy 
in Three Acts, by Frank Dumont. For five males and four 
fernales. Time, two hours. Rural costumes. Scenes rural ex- 
terior and interior. An adventurer obtains a large sum of money 
from a farm house through the intimidation of the farmer's 
niece, whose husband he claims to be. Her escapes from the 
wiles of the villain and his female accomplice are both starting 
and novel. Price, 15 cents. 

A WHITE MOUNTAIN BOY. A Strong Melodrama in 
Five Acts, by Charles Townsend. For seven males and four 
females, and three supers. Time, two hours and twenty minutes. 
One exterior, three interiors. Costumes easy. The hero, a 
country lad, twice saves the life of a banker's daughter, which 
results in their betrothal. A scoundrelly clerk has the banker 
in his power, but the White Mountain boy finds a way to check- 
mate his schemes, saves the banker, and wins the girl. Price 
15 cents. 

THE PENN PUBLISHING COMPANY 

PHILADELPHIA 



At the Theatre 

A Monologue 



By 
SARA VENORE SHRINER 




PHILADELPHIA 

THE PENN PUBLISHING COMPANY 

19 I 8 









Copyright 191 8 by The Penn Publishing Company 



NOV 22 1918 

TMP96-00 6823 

At the Theatre 

§)aD 50747 



At the Theatre 



CHARACTER 

A Pennsylvania Dutch woman. She wears a close-fitting 
black waist and a full skirt ; small bonnet or old-fashioned 
hat with elastic band ; white cotton gloves or mitts. She 
carries a large umbrella and a hand-bag. No scenery is re- 
quired except a chair, left center. 

Time of Presentation. — About twelve minutes. 



At the Theatre 



(Enter Dutch Woman, looking around.) 

Yes, veil dis is da Lyric Seater. I vonder vhere day 
sell tickets fer da play. 

(Comes to stage c. Talks to woman who goes by.) 

Oxcoose me, missus, but vould you tell me, please, 
vhere to make buyings of tickets fer Romeo und Juliet ? 
Inside dere? All right, sank you wery much. 

( Crosses to l. of stage. ) 

Hov^ tydo mister. Is dis da place vhere you buy 
tickets fer da play? It is — ain't! Hovv^ much you 
say dey are? OvchestrsLy tv^o dollars. (Thinking.) 
Orchestra — vhy, vat you mean by orchestra? Och, 
be sure ! Dem's da mens vhat makes da music play — 
ain't ? 

Veil nov^r if I vouldn't hsten to da music — vould it 
be cheaper? 

It vouldn't. 

Vat's dat? Balcony, one dollar. 

Veil, now, I don'd vant to make settings on da bal- 
cony out — I vant to see da shov^. 

Vhat you say? Oh, dem's da seats up higher den 
dem orchestra seats — nov^ could I hear and see schust 
as veil up dere? 

I could. 

Den I vill take vone fer up dere. (Opens her pocket- 
book.) One dollar, you say — can you change a tvi^o 
dollar bill ? I ain't got no vone. 

(Takes her ticket, walks away and goes back again.) 

5 



6 AT THE THEATRE 

Oh, say, Mister, vould you mindt keeping mine um- 
brella till after da play's ofer? You don'd do dat? 
All right. Vich vay I go up? Dem steps, und gife 
my ticket to da man up dere? All right. Good-bye. 

( Crosses to r. of stage. ) 

Are you da man vhat takes dis ticket? You are, 
ain't. 

All right, I'll follow you (walks l.) down dere in 
front of dem vimmen — seat twelve? All right, sank 
you. 

Oxcoose me, missus, but dere ain't no other vay of 
gettin' in here; da man said fer me to set on seat 
number twelve. 

(Turns around and looks for the seat.) 

Oh, is dat it? 

(Sits. Puts umbrella under seat.) 

Och, du lieber, it makes me all out of vint to walk so 
many steps up. (To woman on her R.) You come to 
see da play too, ain't? I put mine umbrella under da 
seat. 

My, ain't dis a vonderful nice big building? Vhat's 
all dem lights hangin' der endt of dat sthick on? 
(Pause.) On, such a chanticleer! Yes — veil — it is 
certainly nice. 

Dem seats over dere look like dey might break down 
if you set in dem. Vat? (Pause.) Oh, dem's da 
box seats. Oh, yes, I see. 

I vonder if I'll like it. 

I readt da book onct of Romeo und Juliet. I don'd 
read ofden dem kindt of books but I sought dat vas 
certainly grant. 

Vhat time you say it starts? Eight o'clock? Oh, 
vhy ve're early, ain't ve? Veil, I'm like pop — I like 
to go early to such places und get a good seat. I vish 
I vould 'a' brung some knittings along vis me yet. 
You belong to such a Red Cross too, ain't ! In Reading 
up ve make so much knittings fer da boys already. 

Vhat you say? (Pause.) 



AT THE THEATRE 



Oh, must ve take our hats off? Vhere ve put dem? 
I don'd see no nails vhat to hang dem on. Vhat? 
(Pause.) Under da seat? Veil, I nefer keep my hat 
on da floor. Von't da man vhat's back of me tramp 
mit his shoes all ofer it? (Pause.) He can't? 
(Pause.) Veil, schust as you say 

( Takes off her hat. ) 

Dese gums is handy sings fer on da hats, ain't? 

(Puis it under the seat. Taps woman in front on 
shoulder. ) 

Oxcoose me, lady, take your hat off, vhy don'd you, 
und put it under da seat ? Dat's de vay I do. (Pause.) 

Oh, you vill take it off vhen you're readv. Veil, I 
didn't vant to make you madt. I vould be glad 'if 
some vone told me how to do vhen I didn't know. (To 
woman on her r.) I didn't vant to hurt her feelings. 

You know, my daughter Annie reat in da news- 
paper dat dis play vas going to be acted out, und she 
knowed how I liked da book, so she sait I vas to schust 
come to da city to see da play und because she needed 
some new sphring dresses I could schust brung dem 
along home. 

Yes, I come alone ; vhy, pop he vould have come too, 
but he IS so busy always in da sphring fixin' up da 
house aroundt. He vas laying cement boardwalks 
vhen I come down. 

Vhat's dese little books fer vhat he give? (Pause.) 
Och, be sure— dese is da programs— vhv vhat?— vhat 
IS It?— da vhat (very excited) da Leglong Cafe— vhv, 
I sought dey vere going to play Romeo und Juliet. 
Oh, just such advertisement, they certainly could fool 
a body, ain't ! Oh, yes, here it is— Romeo und Juliet 
by Vilham Shakespeare. Veil, he certainlv must 'a' 
been a schmart man. Annie tells me of so many sings 
vhat he wrote. 

(Surprised.) I guess it begins vhen dey make out 
da lights.^ (Looks down on stage eagerly.) 

Oh, mine gracious, ain't dat grant— dem people is 
fine lookin'— dere's Tibalt. Dat's Juliet's cousin, ain't ? 



8 AT THE THEATRE 

{Long pause.) Now dere comes Romeo — ain't he 
pretty but Och, he looks so -sat. I guess be- 
cause he lofed her so much. {To lady hack of her.) 
Yes, yes, I vill keep quiet — but anyway, I vasn't 
spheaking to you. 

Oh, vhy da curtain made down — it ain't ofer, is it? 
{Pause.) Just end of act vone? Veil, I sought any- 
how dat da book vhat I reat vas longer den dat. 

I certainly like it, don'd you ? Dey make nice music 
too, ain't? 

Who is da man vhat's sthanding und schwinging mit 
der headts of der people ofer mit a shtick? {Pause.) 
Oh, he leads dem — he certainly is goot at it. I vas 
vonct to da — A-ca-demy of Music in Philadelphy, und 
dere dey made such vonderful nice music. My Annie 

plays some pieces on da organ Och, now, vhat 

is it? Ain't dat funny — dot one — it schust slipped 
my mindt. It's such a patriotic song. Oh, yes, " Keep 
da Fires Burning at Home " — und — " Brighten da 
Corner Vhere You Are " vone of dem Sunday hymns. 
Yes, she schust plays dem on da organ, but it makes 
so nice. I guess it vould make pretty if dem men 
vould play 'em on all dem instruments yet! {Pause.) 

Now, dere makes da curtain up again. Dere comes 
Romeo und Juliet. Don'd dey look nice together ? 

Och, hear how he spheaks to her. " Vhat light 
shrough yonder vintow breaks? It is da east und 
Juliet is da sun." Don'd he call her nice already yet? 
Oh, I like it. {Looks under seat for umbrella.) Och, 
mine umbrella — I sought mebbe it got avay. I'm very 
pertickler about it. Pop gave it to me before ve vas 
married. Yes, ve're now married some twenty or 
sirty years. Vat's dat? {Pause.) Vhy, ve haf vone 
girl — Annie — und vone boy, Villie — Villie is now at 
Camp Meade down ; he is such a Sergeant. 

Annie she puts me so much in mindt of Juliet — she 
is schust about so big as her. Dis play makes me sink 
of da time vhen me und pop vas young. He used to 
talk so to me — veil, not in dem same vords, but dey 
meant da same. 

It's too bad, ain't, dat dere moms and pops couldn't 



AT THE THEATRE 9 

make out agreeing — as to my judgment I don'd sink 
Romeo could have got a nicer and purttier girl fer a 
vife den Juliet — do you? 

{Feels in her hand-hag excitedly.) 

Och, du lieber, I sought my camphire bottle vas 
broke ! Annie makes me always take it along. 

Oh, my, listen how Juliet talks now. Och, ain't dat 
sadt ! {Weeping.) " God knows vhen we shall meet 
agin." 

Yes — yes — I vill keep quiet. Oh, vhy don'd she let 
da nurse come? Och, gootness, she has a knife — und 
some poison! {Shrieking.) O-O-Oh, she drunk it! 
Und her last vords vere fer him {crying), " Romeo, I 
come, I come, — dis do I drink to thee ! " I feel so 
sorry for Romeo. He loved her so much. {Weeping.) 

{Long pause. Wipes her eyes, sniffles a hit, then 
looks suddenly at stage and becomes very much 
scared.) Dat's da church yardt, ain't? Listen how 
he spheaks to her und she's deadt. Oh, he's going to 
take poison too. How vere his vords — " Here's to my 
lofe — thus vis a kiss I die." It's sadt dey bose take 
poison. But den maybe such sings always happen fer 
da best. 

{Frightened.) Vhy, it ain't no fire, is it? Fer vhy 
are all da people gettin' up? {Pause.) You say da 
show's ofer ? Vhy don'd dey show twict ? Veil, I cer- 
tainly did enjoy dat vonct. 

{Gets up and looks under seat for hat and umhrella.) 

Vhere's my umbrella und hat ? Veil, it looks pretty 
much like he vas on my hat wis his shoes. 

{Puts on hat.) 

Veil, I certainly enjoyed it, didn't you? I vish only 
my Annie und pop could have saw it. Say, missus, 
if you ever come to Reading up, vhy come around to 
see me. {Pause.) Oh, it ain't hardt to findt— ve live 
da church beside — anybody can tell you vhere Sweitz- 
elheimers live. Yes. Veil, goot-night. 

{Exit.) 



Unusually Good Entertainments 

Read One or More of These Before Deciding on 
Your Next Program 

GRADUATION DAY AT WOOD HILL SCHOOL. 

An Entertainment in Two Acts, by Ward Macauley. For six 
males and four females, with several minor parts. Time of 
playing, two hours. Modern costumes. Simple interior scenes; 
may be presented in a hall without scenery. The unustial com- 
bination of a real "entertainment," including music, recitations, 
etc., with an interesting love story. The graduation exercises 
include short speeches, recitations, songs, funny interruptions, 
and a comical speech by a country school trustee. Price, 15 
cents. 

EXAMINATION DAY AT WOOD HILL SCHOOL. 

An Entertainment in One Act, by Ward Macauley. Eight male 
and six female characters, with minor parts. Plays one hour. 
Scene, an easy interior, or may be given without scenery. Cos- 
tumes, modern. Miss Marks, the teacher, refuses to marry a 
trustee, who threatens to discharge her. The examination in- 
cludes recitations and songs, and brings out many funny answers 
to questions. At the close Robert Coleman, an old lover, claims 
the teacher. Very easy and very effective. Price, 15 cents. 

BACK TO THE COUNTRY STORE. A Rural Enter- 
tainment in Three Acts, by Ward Macauley. For four male 
and five female characters, with some supers. Time, two hours. 
Two scenes, both easy interiors. Can be played effectively with- 
out scenery. Costumes, modern. All the principal parts are 
sure hits. Quigley Higginbotham, known as "Quig," a clerk in 
a country store, aspires to be a great author or singer and 
decides to try his fortunes in New York. The last scene is in 
Quig's home. He returns a failure but is offered a partnership 
in the country store. He pops the question in the midst of a 
surprise party given in his honor. Easy to do and very funny. 
Price, 15 cents. 

THE DISTRICT CONVENTION. A Farcical Sketch 
in One Act, by Frank Dumont. For eleven males and one 
female, or twelve males. Any number of other parts or super- 
numeraries may be added. Plays forty-five minutes. No special 
scenery is required, and the costumes and properties are ali 
easy. The play shows an uproarious political nominating con- 
vention. The climax comes when a woman's rights cham- 
pion, captures the convention. There is a great chance to bur- 
lesque modern politics and to work in local gags. Every 
part will make a hit. Price, 15 cents. 

SI SLOCUM'S COUNTRY STORE. An Entertainment 
in One Act, by Frank Dumont. Eleven male and five female 
characters with supernumeraries. Several parts may be doubled. 
Plays one hour. Interior scene, or may be played without set 
scenery. Costumes, modern. The rehearsal for an entertain- 
ment in the village church gives plenty of opportunity foi 
specialty work. A very jolly entertainment of the sort adapted 
to almost any place or occasion. Price, 15 cents. 

THE PENN PUBLISHING COMPANY 

PHILADELPHIA 



Unusually Good Eotertainmeiits 

Read One or More of These Before Deciding on 
Your Next Program 

A SURPRISE PARTY AT BRINKLEY'S. An En- 
tertainment in One Scene, by Ward Macauley. Seven male and 
seven female characters. Interior scene, or may be given with- 
out scenery. Costumes, modern. Time, one hour. By the 
author of the popular successes, "Graduation Day at Wood Hill 
School," "Back to the Country Store," etc. The villagers have 
planned a birthday surprise party for Mary Brinkley, recently 
graduated from college. They all join in joUy games, songs, 
conundrums, etc., and Mary becomes engaged, which surprises 
the surprisers. The entertainment is a sure success. Price, 15 cents,, 

JONES VS, JINKS. A Mock Trial in One Act, by 
Edward Mumford. Fifteen male and six female characters, with 
supernumeraries if desired. May be played all male. Many of the 
parts (members of the jury, etc.) are small. Scene, a simple 
interior; may be played without scenery. Costumes, modern. 
Time of playing, one hour. This mock trial has many novel 
features, unusual characters and quick action. Nearly every 
character has a funny entrance and laughable lines. There are 
many rich parts, and fast fun throughout. Price, 15 cents. 

THE SIGHT-SEEING CAR. A Comedy Sketch in One 
Act, by Ernest M. Gould. For seven males, tv»^o females, or 
may be all male. Parts may be doubled, with quick changes, so 
that four persons may play the sketch. Time, forty-five minutes. 
Simple street scene. Costumes, modern. The superintendent 
of a sight-seeing automobile engages two m.en to run the 
machine. A Jew, a farmer, a fat lady and other humorous 
characters give them all kinds of trouble. This is a regular gat- 
ling-gun stream of rollicking repartee. Price, 15 cents. 

THE CASE or SMYTHE VS. SMITH, An Original 
Mock Trial in One Act, by Frank Dumont. Eighteen males 
and two females, or may be all male. Plays about one hour. 
Scene, a county courtroom ; requires no scenery ; may be played 
in an ordinary hall. Costumes, modern. This entertainment is 
nearly perfect of its kind, and a sure success. It can be easily 
produced in any place or on any occasion, and provides almost 
-any number of good parts. Price, 15 cents. 

THE OLD MAIDS' ASSOCIATION. A Farcical Enter- 
tainment in One Act, by Louise Latham Wilson. For thirteen 
females and one male. The male part may be played by a 
female, and the nurnber of characters increased to twenty or 
more. Time, forty rhinutes. The play requires neither scenery 
nor properties, and very little in the way of costumes. Can 
easily be prepared in one or two rehearsals. Price, 25 cents. 

BARGAIN DAY AT BLOOMSTEIN'S. A Farcical 
Entertainment in One Act, by Edward Mumford. For five males 
and ten^ females, with supers. Interior scene. Costumes, mod- 
ern. Time, thirty minutes. The characters and the situations 
which arise from their endeavors to buy and sell make rapid-fire 
fun from start to finish. Price, 15 cents. 

THE PENN PUBLISHING COMPANY 

PHILADELPHIA 



Successful Plays for All Girls 

In Selecting Your Next Play Do Not Overlook This List 

YOUNG DOCTOR DEVINE. A Farce in Two Acts, 
by Mrs. E. J. H. Goodfellow. One of the most popular 
plays for girls. For nine female characters. Time in 
playing, thirty minutes. Scenery, ordinary interior. Mod- 
ern costumes. Girls in a boarding-school, learning that a 
young doctor is coming to vaccinate all the pupils, eagerly con- 
sult each other as to the manner of fascinating the physician. 
When the doctor appears upon the scene the pupils discover that 
the physician is a female practitioner. Price, 15 cents. 

SISTER MASONS. A Burlesque in One Act, by Frank 
DuMONT. For eleven females. Time, thirty minutes. Costumes, 
fantastic gowns, or dominoes. Scene, interior. A grand expose 
of Masonry, Some women profess to learn the secrets of a 
Masonic lodge by hearing their husbands talk in their sleep, 
and they institute a similar organization. Price, 15 cents. 

A COMMANDING POSITION. A Farcical Enter- 
tainment, by Amelia Sanford. For seven female char- 
acters and ten or more other ladies and children. Time, one 
hour. Costumes, modern. Scenes, easy interiors and one street 
scene.^ Marian Young gets tired living with her aunt, Miss 
Skinflint. She decides to "attain a commanding position." 
Marian tries hospital nursing, college settlement work and 
school teaching, but decides to go back to housework. Price, 15 
cents. 

HOW A WOMAN KEEPS A SECRET. A Comedy 
in One Act, by Frank Dumont. For ten female characters. 
Time, half an hour. Scene, an easy interior. Costumes, modern. 
Mabel Sweetly has just become engaged to Harold, but it's "the 
deepest kind of a secret." Before announcing it they must win 
the approval of Harold's uncle, now in Europe, or lose a possible 
ten thousand a year. At a tea Mabel meets her dearest friend. 
Maude sees Mabel has a secret, she coaxes and Mabel tells her. 
But Maude lets out the secret in a few minutes to another 
friend and so the secret travels. Price, 15 cents. 

THE OXFORD AFFAIR. A Comedy in Three Acts, 
by Josephine H. Cobb and Jennie E. Paine. For eight female 
characters. Plays one hour and three-quarters. Scenes, inter- 
iors at a seaside hotel. Costumes, modern. The action of the 
play is located at a summer resort. Alice Graham, in order to 
chaperon herself, poses as a widow, and Miss Oxford first claims 
her as a sister-in-law, then denounces her. The onerous duties 
of Miss Oxford, who attempts to serve as chaperon to Miss 
Howe and Miss Ashton in the face of many obstacles, furnish 
an evening of rare enjoyment. Price 15 cents. 

THE PENN PUBLISHING COMPANY 

PHILADELPHIA 



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